#ALSO ORYM FINALLY SAYING IT

[forgetriestowrite]

"You are the reason i'm here"

hey. hey Robbie. what the fuck

[gracefireheart]

Heavy spoilers below, so don’t read it if you haven’t watched c3 ep 52.

I mean it 👁️👁️

I am just-- vibrating in excitement at the FCG content we got this episode and might be getting more of soon™

FCG’s convos with Frida? Banger so far and I can’t wait for more. Especially when it comes to- of course- them being Aeormatons, and how FCG wants to believe in the Changebringer while Frida’s like “but why tho’????🤨”

FCG’s convos with Deanna? Love them a fuckton too. And I’m still smiling at that moment between FCG and Deanna where she gave them her knitted scarf thingy, and FCG told her how she should save it for someone that needed it, and she said “I did” like alkjfhalkfhjalkshjfla You’re tearing me apart, Aabria orz God damn

FCG potentially having an acronym behind their facemask? Makes me wonder- if they do get it open and see an acronym there- whether they might try using that name as well along with FCG and Letters.

FCG potentially having their wheel switched out for robotic legs? I am very interested to say the least, and- if they do switch out their wheel with legs- I wonder how their missing buddies are gonna react to that (especially Ashton since they wouldn’t need to carry FCG as much around in difficult terrains (tho’ mostly stairs) then).

FCG using Shared Dream on Frida to experience what might be Frida’s Aeor memories? HO BOY DO YOU KNOW I’M EXCITED FOR THAT. Also the sorta high potential of FCG snapping during that if they see something that might trigger them a bit, as some critters have pointed out :]

Just lots of stuff I’m excited for with this lil’ robit <3

[acebabecd]

As much as I’d love to see a C3 adaptation, it would be really hard to adapt into an animated series with the streaming standard 12-ish episode length seasons

Compared to the heroic epic of Vox Machina, Bell’s Hells is more of an ongoing mystery. Mystery stories are built on gradual reveals and discoveries that add on to each other and get more complex. The pacing and build up are key.

So you either start at the beginning of the campaign and have a first 12 episodes that feel anticlimactic compared to the group who killed a dragon in their premiere, or you start somewhere in the middle and have to cut out/change the order of so much build up that the payoff feels like nothing

In the unlikely event Campaign 3 ever got adapted, it would really need the old school 24-ish episode season to really thrive

[molliehaswords]

I hope when we switch to the other party I don’t become insufferable like the people who only have one favorite in Team Wildemount. And that The Thing I Really Don’t Want But Other People Seem Convinced Is Perfect doesn’t remotely get touched.

Fingers crossed for completely new PCs as guests who are connected to Ashton and the Hishari more than anything else. 🤞🤞🤞

[kerosene-in-a-blender]

The conversation between Dorian and Orym this episode was incredible, and I especially like how true to their characters it was both in terms of how they eventually admitted their feelings for each other and why neither broached the subject before this point.

Orym is straightforward and practical and grounded, and after he admits he's been keeping something from Dorian, he comes right out and says it. "I have feelings for you." Dorian, in contrast, ever the bard and performer, tells a story. He talks about how Orym is the reason he's with Bells Hells and he's always been the reason he is. He talks about never having felt this way before about anyone and maybe that's because Orym's is "the first beautiful, kind face [he's] ever seen." He's not nearly as direct as Orym, but the feelings and emotions are just as clear in the way he talks to and about him.

Both also make it clear in this conversation why they've held back in admitting they love the other. Orym, who's been expected and acting as Bells Hells only sane person and moral anchor for pretty much the entire time the Hells have been together, was swallowing his feelings because he didn't want to burden Dorian with something he assumed wasn't reciprocated. Especially after Dorian came back having clearly had a harrowing experience involving the Crownkeepers that ultimately led to his brother's death. Dorian meanwhile, is someone who is constantly anxiously second-guessing himself and is also experiencing all of this for the first time. And thusly he doesn't feel like he can ask anything of a man whom he knows has been widowed and whose husband's murderers they are actively pursuing and opposing. Both have been holding back because there has been so much else going on and they don't want to add another thing to the pile of "shit Dorian/Orym is dealing with". But with the confrontation with Ludinus rapidly approaching and neither's survival guaranteed both finally went, "if not now, when?" and took the leap.

[peripecias-i]

the difference in how Liam was playing Orym to the audience before talking to Will (ep 104) and now (ep 105) is so amazing. Since Orym is finally open to his feelings we are also seeing his feeling. THE FUCKING "HOW MUCH HE LOVES DORIAN". So many breadcrumbs... they are officially crutons.

And as I always say, Mr. Liam O'Brian it's time for you to live a romance IN GAME. Go my little hafling, present yourself to your furure in law, straighten that relationship between the air people, be happy and live your life

[zwoftt]

WEEKLY DORYM MOMOS N OTHER STUFF!!! (in no particular order)))

the chemistry between bells hells and the mighty nein is just so good. i had an absolute blast watching

the settle nod orym gives when jester says dorian is “really handsome” when shaking dorian’s hand

”mr. dorian” cad says when calling over to dorian, who looks a little startled at the professional nickname

dorian nodding in agreement to orym’s plan, as he normally does.

the way dorian tries to show off his abs next to beau after orym asks her what her routine is. the laughter afterwards when he gets embarrassed!!!!

jester winning over braius and getting more backstory than anyone else. so golden.

the jealousy of dorian when he sees how many people are in relationships and [not him] because he’s being a scaredy cat

caleb knocking sense into orym. CALEB KNOCKING SENSE INTO ORYM!!!

anybody else think dorian was trying to set up braius and veth really hard just to get him off of orym??

no thoughts just dorian and yasha bonding over music

the nervous glances robbie and liam share when they’re thinking about what to do with their characters …. especially after robbie tried to knock on orym’s door earlier in the episode but it was drowned out by shenanigans

the frantic inspiration dorian gives to braius when he’s painting orym

everyone getting so silent and so excited when dorian knocks on orym’s door. so is liam! his eyes light up immediately!

the whole confession scene was just so, so, so good. so beautifully well done. it made sense for both characters, and honestly so satisfying to see the moment happen after three years of consecutive pining/yearning. dorian giving orym the chance to make his own choices, and orym curling up in dorian’s embrace immediately just to be there,,, “not wanting to spoil the moment”. some of my favorite lines though, “let me comfort you for once,” from dorian; unaware that he WAS[is] in fact orym’s form of comfort but also implying that dorian finds immense comfort in orym, and orym’s “this is okay.” accepting the fact he is in love with dorian, finally, and truly. INTERLOCKING THEIR FINGERS. sound familiar??? something he couldn’t do with will in the vision???? but he instead does it now with dorian????? uuuuuhghhhhghhhhhh …. dorian fantasizing about them before falling asleep to the sound of orym’s breathing,,, orym staying awake longer to once again watch dorian sleep before passing out too.

also the fact the confession scene wasn’t too dramatic but still surprising and amazingly done just makes that feel so much more REAL. like how REAL LIFE confessions would be with highly traumatized people. not even mad they didn’t kiss yet because boy… just—- ugjjjjhh it was so beautiful, so raw. and it was robbie’s first time doing a romance roleplay too!!!

in the cooldown and [from introspection] robbie says dorian is very inexperienced with love and the feeling of it- since he was sheltered for so long; so orym is basically his first love(but dorian is just also super nervous and respectful towards will and orym’s relationship so that explains why he was so careful about expressing himself too.) and liam mentions orym was too shy to do anything himself so that’s why he had his other character go in there and just slap him on the ass because he wanted orym to talk to dorian somehow. which means that both robbie(dorian) and liam(orym) WANTED to have that exact moment between them, BOTH WANTED them to talk. and also the entire cast was fawning over them, matt getting teary eyed and the girls whispering and laughing to each other, sam getting excited himself and tal just smiling like a dork. everyone was just so proud of them!

DORYM NATION HOW ARE WE FEELING FOR NEXT EPISODES??? IM SO EXCITED TO SEE THE AWKWARD LAUGHTER, LOVESICK FLIRTATION AND EVEN MORE FROM OUR FAVORITE BOYS now time to start the cycle again of waiting years for them to kiss (i hope not please god)

[ilanarose7]

Some outcomes of Critical Role episode 91 (that happened either because of or completely separate from the big thing)

SPOILERS!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!

Starting with the ones not due to FCG's sacrifice:

Liliana has some level of trust and attempts at redemption with her daughter (those 31's on deception and persuasion Laura you legend!), which means a major player (and VESSEL?? tf was that about) who was formerly (and maybe kind of still) on Ludinus's side is swapping over

Ashton and Fearne are about to be exhausted from being Titans (Ashton much sooner since they powered up in ep. 90)

Zathuda is both proud and angry towards Fearne which is both terrifying and a bit heartwarming(?)

Nana (I think/hope it was her bending fate) was able to help Team Infiltration escape the Weavemind after Orym reached out

Now for the other outcomes due to FCG's sacrifice:

Orym's deal with Nana should be void since the group cannot return as they were (VM Spoiler Note: Liam's PC was finally saved from a deal leading to a life of service by Sam's PC after he wasn't able to in C1)

Chetney is ALIVE! I'm counting this as part of the sacrifice bc due to weird leveling circumstances Sam sacrificed his one brand-new 7th-level spell slot to take Revivify, which is a major thing to give up

Otohan is DEAD! GONE! That is a MAJOR player off the board and another one of Ludinus's high-ranking members off the board

FCG is dead, seemingly unrevivable based on how Matt phrased it (asking to make sure Sam understood what it meant). That will have MAJOR implications going forward.

On a D&D technical level, there is no primary healer meaning that Fearne has to take some healing spells or the party can't heal at all (pretty sure they used up all their potions during that fight).

On a character level, this is going to be devastating. Ashton, who started this whole adventure with FCG and has been saying for a LONG time that FCG was going to get themself killed, was unconscious when FCG made the ultimate sacrifice. Sending works, which means when they get back to Exandria, Imogen will probably be the one to let FRIDA know what happened.

On a slightly lighter note, I feel like Travis is going to shine next week. It's been said before and I'll say it again, Chetney is the heart of Bells Hells. He knows how to be there for this family and I have a feeling that will come to the forefront as we see the aftermath

I'm sure there are more outcomes, but these are the ones on my mind after barely sleeping last night following that episode. Sam knows how to play this game well and cuts straight to the heart while doing so. It was masterfully played and while completely devastating to watch, was also incredibly heroic and beautiful.

Good game, great players, amazing DM, and of course thank you Fresh Cut Grass for being a Faithful Care-Giver until the end

[annemarieyeretzian]

chetney saying “orym keeps the sword… I agree, it’s his to do with as he chooses. laudna, he’s lost more than we have, and I trust him. but I also trust you.” and laudna snapping “thank you. but do not ever speak to me about loss again.” and leaving,,,

it’s finally clicked for me why this bothers me. because laudna has lost. laudna is still suffering loss. she’s allowed to bring her experiences, her feelings, and her grief up however and whenever she wants. but this is the thing laudna always says: “don’t speak to me of loss.” it refuses to allow anyone else to have experienced (or to also be experiencing) loss. again, of course laudna has lost. of course laudna has suffered. but… so has everyone else in bell’s hells. treating loss like the suffering winter’s crest festival isn’t fair, healthy, or helpful.

if anyone else should be ‘allowed’ speak to laudna of loss, chetney is maybe the most reasonable choice: he’s lost his entire family, he’s lost his home, he’s lost lovers, he was cursed with lycanthropy (no matter the fact that he loves this aspect of himself – it was still a change, still a loss of sorts), he’s likely outlived most everyone he’s ever known. chetney does get to speak of loss. laudna is the only one living with her murderer in her head. that’s horrific. no one understands it. no one can understand it. and, not but, everyone else’s grief is also extensive, significant, and valid. it affects who they are. it informs their day-to-day decisions. they are allowed to speak of loss.

[codeopod]

The Hells dispersed into their tent and began dropping all their gear near respective beds and taking shots from the bottles Ashton managed to scavenge. Weariness and heartbreak had begun to give way to a delirious happiness at seeing their old friend return.

“Dorian! There’s someone else you have to meet!” Laudna flourished excitedly, “Oh Pâté!” She called.

Just over her shoulder a creature popped into existence, wobbling and flapping the bat-like wings that barely kept it aloft. “Yes mum watcha’ need?”

Dorian was taken aback. “Oh my god! He’s alive? He’s real? That’s a real-thing?!”

“Oh ‘ello Dory! ’s been a while.” The bird skull turned to address him.

“Dorian. It certainly has, wow, did you get…bigger?”

“He’s a bit bigger, yeah.” Imogen added, dropping her head over Laudnas shoulder.

“Oh an’ these two!” Pâté flapped out to turn and gesture at them. “They finally forked the meat pie-if you know what I mean-“

“Pâté! You crude little pest.”

“-‘ey lock me in ma’ house at night now, gets awful scary with the noises ‘ey-“

Laudna brought her hands together like she was swatting a bug midair and Pâté yelped as his form squisheed and burst into black goo. “That’s quite enough of that.”

“Oh, well-I, congratulations you two, if I am understanding his…way with words…correctly?”

“We’re datin’ yeah.” Imogen couldn’t help but laugh.

“That’s wonderful! Honestly I thought you’d been secretly together this whole time.”

“You’re not the first to say that, actually.”

“I also have a wolf in my chest! Would you like to meet him?” Laudna bounced excitedly towards Dorian, who scrambled backwards.

“A what?! I-um sure?”

Dorian watched helplessly as a massive wolf literally burst out of Laudna’s chest. He held his bladder but took several steps back to keep his shoes free of ichor. “Oh, wow-you weren’t kidding, that is a very large dog.”

The thing was half rotten and only really had fur along its head and spine. Ghostly glowing mist drifted around it and seeped from the gapping wounds in its side. It gnashed its teeth as it turned to look at him. It’s eyes glowed a sickly green that was almost hypnotizing, only breaking away when Imogen whistled and it bounded happily over to sit at her heel.

“That’s a good boy.” She cooed and rubbed at his ears.

Laudna echoed his praises. “His name is Caviar, isn’t he gorgeous?”

“He certainly…suits your style!”

Orym joined them then, watching Dorians expressions carefully. “Guys, maybe let’s save some excitement for the morning?”

“Rest does sound nice, though I may not sleep.” Dorian admitted his face darkening, “…not after seeing that!” He tried to spin it as a joke but Orym’s frown deepened.

“You can bunk with me -and Fearne- if you want?”

“…I will admit, I have missed our cuddle piles.” Dorian smiled softly. The two men stared at eachother for an extended moment while Imogen and Laudna looked between them.

Laudna snickered but Imogen’s eyes sparkled with mischief as she pressed into Laudna’s side. “Well then, are you ready for bed, baby?” She purred just loud enough to be overheard. “We can leave the boys to their…cuddlin’.”

Dorian choked out a cough, his cheeks darkening. Laudna melted, twirling her hair around a finger and smiling a dopey grin. “We can have our own cuddle pile.”

“Of course.” Imogen grinned before rocking up on her toes and pulling Laudna into a soft kiss. The hound at their side jumped to his feet and did an excited twirl, tail wagging as his master sighed happily.

“I-uh- we should just-“ Dorian sputtered. Orym resisted an eye roll but smiled fondly at the pair. “Yeah, let’s go find Fearne.”

“I heard we’re kissing?” Fearne popped up behind them with a wine bottle in her hand. “It’s about time!”

Orym groaned into his hands, face heating.

[thewickedkat]

long post incoming; meta enthusiasts may wish to digest this in chunks.

i am so completely exasperated with Laudna as of the latest episode. however, i temper that exasperation with my enjoyment as a viewer; indeed, i am feasting on the conflict, thinking finally, some good fucking food, because i think (and have always thought) that Laudna is terrifically interesting as a character and she presents wonderful opportunities for growth not only on her end, but as a catalyst for others.

that being said. the sword. how she handled it. how she handled her own trauma bubbling up, how she handled (or didn't) Delilah, how she handled Orym and Chetney and Dorian and the whole miserable mess she made.

it was selfish. there. i said it. you may disagree with me, i care not, but her course of action was terribly selfish and destructive.

i know many people out there have been likening her behaviour to that of an addict's (and there are many common factors there: the hiding, the lying by omission, the shame, the acquiescence to bad behaviour), but i think in some ways that to do so is reductive, and also removes agency from Laudna herself.

she is allowing her trauma to almost make her decisions for her, allowing it to define her, and she is not giving herself the opportunity to realise that growth beyond it is possible--or, perhaps, she does realise this and is simply too afraid to reach out and grasp it. i think even if Delilah weren't trying to subsume her, Laudna would still be self-sabotaging and self-destructive and still try to hide the parts of her she felt were undesirable; Delilah in many ways simply makes it easier for Laudna to do so and, if pressed, provides a rationalisation for Laudna's choices and actions (as in 'it wasn't me, it was her, she made me do it).

first and foremost, Laudna was a victim of heinous trauma, being murdered and then being put on grotesque display. then she was further traumatised in coming back from the dead and being forced to isolate herself from people for many years, with only Delilah's honeysweet venom dripping into her ear for that time. then she is murdered again as an object lesson for the woman she loves, then stuffed down so deep into her own psyche by the one who first killed her; she is fought for and brought back by her friends...who then seem to do little to check in with her, to make sure she is stable, or coping, because they each have their own baggage and oh by the way, the world is possibly ending. to be fair, there is little time for therapy and stability when you are literally running from crisis to crisis and trying to stop something you haven't even conceived of in your nightmares.

she feels dismissed, often, minimised, and she never developed healthy people skills or coping mechanisms (i am sorry but as much as i love Pâté, a dead rat does not a support group make). so she lashes out, has poor emotional regulation, and Does Crappy Things. so i also understand when she said 'what else have i to give, but myself?'

all that being said. what she did with Orym and the sword was fucking selfish. she is behaving like a child, as if she is the only one whose tragedies matter; she's playing Oppression Olympics, and can i just point out that Orym was the one to say 'i'm sorry' but Laudna never apologised for accosting him while he slept and hurting him? saying 'i didn't mean to hurt you' is not the same, because that implies that if she had not hurt him, stealing from him was perfectly acceptable and reasonable.

i don't believe her when she said 'i accept responsibility' because that means one must accept the consequences of their own actions, and right after she said that, she argued with everyone, told the oldest member of the Hells that he had no right to talk about loss to her, and then fled. that isn't accepting responsibility; that is mouthing platitudes in the hopes you will sway others to your point of view and when it fails, leaving in a huff like a child having a tantrum.

she didn't even bother to ask Orym why he kept the sword. she just tried to take.

Laudna often reacts from a place of fear: of pain, of more trauma, fear of inadequacy, of loss. all of these fears are valid. they are understandable, given all that has happened to her. but just because her fears are valid does not give her the right to make others pay for her emotional baggage. this is what makes her behaviour in ep 95 selfish. all of her actions in the back half of that episode are things she chose to do, and now she must sit in the mess she made. Laudna seems to be falling into the same mental rut that many victims fall into when their trauma isn't dealt with in a healthy fashion: they start fucking others over, as if being a victim excuses it. it does not.

and before others come for me, i say that as one who used to do the same fucking thing but i was lucky enough to have therapy. Laudna doesn't have that luxury--none of the Hells do. there simply isn't time to make space for any of their issues, not just Laudna's. Imogen is still wrestling with her mother; Fearne is wrestling with her parentage; Orym is just trying to keep his feet under him and do what he feels is right without betraying anyone he cares for (yes, including Laudna, shut up); Ashton is still trying to process the loss of Fresh Cut Grass (for gods' sakes, the crafting night was a fucking wake for the lil guy); Dorian just lost his brother and watched his friend succumb to a Betrayer God that turned her into a monster; and Chetney? Chetney is an old man who, i personally think, can pick his battles and knows how to compartmentalise better than any of these kids.

Laudna is not unique in that she has suffered horribly. no one is saying she hasn't, but her behaviour implies that she believes they are saying that. her actions imply she believes not only that she does not trust her friends (thanks, Dorian), but that acknowledging others' losses somehow negates hers. there just isn't time to healthily process any of this, which sucks. it does. i do think her friends love her, care for her deeply, and i think part of the reason they haven't checked up on her as much as they could is because a) they're afraid that her problem with Delilah is much worse than they thought (duh, it is); b) they can't fix the Delilah Problem right now even if they were qualified to do so (even Pike couldn't scour that bitch out of Laudna, she said as much); and c) they run the very substantial risk of wholly alienating Laudna if they press the issue too hard, thus not only losing an asset in the fight against the Vanguard and Ludinus, but also a friend and lover.

it's shit, all around, we all know that. but to pretend that it's okay she did what she did to Orym--or worse, somehow transfer responsibility from her onto him and make it his fault--is infantilising and disingenuous at best, and more than a little insulting.

[thisisnotthenerd]

shoutout to ashley for sticking to her plan of granting guidance on the ritual. legit so clutch. she helped get that 30+ roll that i suspect lowered the initial dc from 25 to 20, and then got them to that point from orym’s 18 (which technically crit anyway), and supported imogen’s final charisma roll enough to get them over the edge.

she didn’t describe it much, but now i’m thinking about it—what does guidance from fearne even look like?

guidance, as a spell, can be cast by artificers, clerics, and druid. all magics that connect to the divine, to the working of faith, in the making, in the doing, in existing.

so i’m imagining it coming from different sources of power as it pertains to different things.

like the first roll, for dorian to carve the runes. given braius’ help, i think this guidance would come from a bit of the darker fey, the pact with asmodeus. the part that is a performer, charming her way through life, working with magic in many forms.

for the second, from orym and ashton, i’d say it comes from the part of fearne that is closest to nana morri, to the fatestitcher pulling the strings taut that they might bring clarity and chaos depending on her whims.

and for the last, from imogen and laudna, i think it comes from the ruidusborn connection, but also her rejection of it—pursuing her own path as a druid and rejecting the dark versions of her fate that she does not want.

ultimately, fearne’s guidance is that of the torch in the night, that which can lead the way, can become a controlled, restorative burn, but can also lead to the roaring flames that swallow everything around them.

[tangent101]

Laudna and Apologies

It was quite telling that Laudna did not apologize during the events of the last game. But there is also a certain... how to put it? I understand the mindset of Laudna in not apologizing... and that is the mindset of the addict and on not wanting to admit fault for her actions.

However, there are two things that happened that I think are going to change things. First, Laudna got her hit. She was given the dagger and sucked it in and sated Delilah's hunger. She gave in. And now the need is... lessened. Delilah will want more, don't doubt that for one moment. She will continue to try and erode Laudna's will. (I have to wonder if the next Will save will be a 19 or 20 to resist, seeing she empowered Delilah.)

Much more importantly, Imogen confronted her. She confronted Laudna not with accusations... but with love. And the look on Imogen's face even as she told Laudna "I love you" just shocked Laudna so immensely because this isn't the first time Imogen has watched Laudna succumb to her addiction. And the first time it happened, Imogen said "You lied!" and fled from Laudna, leaving her alone on the deck of the airship.

Look at what happens in that scene. You see Laudna go from defensive and hostile to panicked and scared at Imogen's actions. She was truly scared she had just lost Imogen. (And Imogen's words... when Laudna asked, almost plaintively, "Do you still love me?" and she responds with "I'll always love you, Laudna. I just don't know what to do with it." Ouch. This was just so... tragic and beautiful and delicious.)

She tries to... downplay it a bit. She tries to... handwave things away, saying "I've always been a lot." Imogen says "Fun scary" and after a tiny bit... I think Laudna caught something in the tone. Or Imogen's facial expression. "Still more fun than scary though, right?" And Imogen's "uh huh" just... didn't quite hold true. Laudna had to ask "Yeah?" and that pause before Imogen said "Yeah." Not supportive. Not handwaving away Laudna's scarying. No. There was thought there. There was the fact Laudna scared Imogen.

That's when Laudna broke. "I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it." Imogen doesn't respond, just holding her close... one last "I didn't mean it" with Imogen finally responding "I know." The desperation. The need. I think this broke through to Laudna. This was the moment she truly realized what she has to lose.

People comment on Laudna hitting the bottom before she can start to climb out. I think she just did. I think that she's realized at this moment the complete betrayal she did. She was so angry at Ashton for what he and Fearne did. (She wanted that Shard. She needed that Shard. And she was refused it.) She felt he betrayed them all. And then what does Laudna do but steal the blade that she herself stated was Orym's to do with. She hurt him in her hunger. She acted as a thief and refused to accept responsibility, she blamed Orym for what happened rather than her own actions.

And Imogen just broke through that denial, that need. She did this with her love. She did by supporting her and in doing so reminding her what she could truly lose if she followed this path.

Something in me suspects that Laudna's going to apologize at the start of the next game. It's needed. But it's not needed for Orym. It's not even needed for the Hells. It's needed for Laudna herself. It's said that an addict cannot start to recover until they realize they have a problem. (I know this from personal experience with a spouse who was a high-functioning alcoholic.) And while an apology won't be what fixes everything, while Laudna is going to continue to struggle with Delilah... she just had a huge scare here. Imogen never threatened to leave. But Laudna was suddenly petrified that every time Imogen said "I love you" that there was a "but" attached, that Imogen was going to leave.

(Orym made a Pact with the Fatestitcher. He openly admitted to this to everyone. Might not Imogen be the next to make a Pact, to have Nana Morri replace Delilah as her Patron... but not as a selfish and greedy Patron, but one that is perhaps more... whimsical and less demanding? I was quite surprised Laura didn't approach Nana Morri or ask her what could be done. Then again, she might very well have felt Laudna could handle it.)

tl;dr - Laudna's likely going to apologize at the start of the next episode thanks to Imogen just loving her and not pushing her away while also not condoning her actions.

[alliekitaguchi]

i am choosing to once again don my dorym tin foil hat and say that matt decided to have the monster attack exactly when it did because it would save him from having to give dorian's answer--which should come from robbie himself, due to the nature of the message.

because the ONLY reason dorian wouldn't've answered orym was if he was dead, and i truly do not think matt would kill dorian (a BELOVED pc and friend of the show) off screen.

but there's also the idea that dorian may have been sleeping or otherwise unable to answer--what happens then? does he hear the message when he wakes up? was it too late at that point? were they already back on ruidus when he finally was able to reply? did he reply immediately but orym was already under the influence of the creature within the lake?

i choose to believe that in the next episode on exandria, we'll actually get a response from robbie, because sending doesn't work on the moon and until they go back, there won't be any messages (i think).

but fucking IMAGINE dorian tries to message orym back and orym doesn't answer and the LAST THING dorian heard orym saying was, "if i don't get the chance to say it again... i've really missed you."

[kerosene-in-a-blender]

Orym has been leaning on Imogen as the leader of Bells Hells for most of the campaign. Certainly since before the Solstice. And he's seen her struggling with this and the hard decisions it forces her to make even as he's confident she's up for it. For example when the group had to pick which missions to help the Volition with she clearly struggled with asserting that she did not want the Hells to be involved with the assassination attempt on Liliana. She also constantly second guesses herself and her decisions and agonizes over making the correct ones. So Orym overhearing Imogen speaking with Laudna and saying that she's going to see all this through to the end despite Laudna asserting she can (and should) leave if things get too harrowing? For him it's her finally embracing the traits he's always seen in her and embracing a firmness and a resolve she's long been lacking. So no wonder he's proud.

[utilitycaster]

I think this is the last I have to say about it, certainly not until new episodes air, but the thing about What The Fuck Is Up With That is that it's emblematic of the issues Bells Hells have - and to be honest I suspect always might have - regarding trust. It's a party game. It's a fun way to get surface-level answers. It's an infodump. It's telling not showing. It's not a bad thing, but you don't build trust, actually, by providing every piece of information! In fact, sometimes, it's good to keep your inside thoughts inside! You build trust with other people through your actions: through keeping your word, through proving your ability to do what they expect of you. Perhaps this is a personal experience and not a universal tenet, but people who share everything about themselves right away and people who end up being genuinely reliable and close and trustworthy are often two nearly entirely separate camps.

This also does once again feel like something with an interesting echo within the fandom. Earlier on in the campaign, before the introduction of 4-Sided Dive, I received a lot of questions about whether it would be helpful if we had something like Talks and my response was usually "no, the issue is that I know everything about the backstory and not actually much anyone's motivations; I have a factual list of personal history and I'm looking for a sense of someone's personality." This still comes up occasionally when I talk about Laudna, whose motivations remain hazy much of the time; we have a quite detailed outline of her history but it is missing the only things that actually matter. We know what. We don't know why. Bells Hells knows so much what about each other and they still struggle, even now, with "why".

And when it comes to why, telling people is nice, but it's very easy to lie about motivations. Indeed, that's why Imogen ends up fooled by her mother; she knows what Liliana did but assumed there was a deeper why than there ended up being; that Liliana wasn't simply seduced by the idea that Predathos would free her and Imogen from the burden of their powers but was also working as a force for good within the Vanguard and wouldn't hurt so many people. The revelation that the "why" really was that simple was ultimately why Imogen felt betrayed. Knowing more details about Liliana doesn't help.

Chetney ends up being the illustrative exception here, if that helps. He arrived late to the party. He never played What The Fuck Is Up With That. He even told them what he was there for (looking for Gurge) and lied about the "why" (werewolf reasons) initially. He to this day keeps secrets. But he's open about keeping secrets. That caginess allows him to be one of the party members most people trust on a fundamental level. They don't trust him to be kind, or generous per se; they don't even trust him to not hurt them. But they trust him to not hurt them intentionally, since he's repeatedly shown he will take steps to avoid this. He is cagey and uncooperative during most of the honesty exercise, but when he finally says something, it isn't a judgement - it is an explanation of his own behavior. When he declines to share his deal with Morri, he still reassures them that he did not do anything that would fall to them - and that's honest, and that's what matters, that he made a deal for himself and himself alone. Compare with Orym, who hides even the fact he made the deal, or Ashton a couple days ago, who hid their true plans with the shard. On the surface, Chetney is the one hiding something - but he is honest that he hides things. If Chetney's secret comes out? It won't change the party's understanding of his trustworthiness; it will just change some of the facts. If Orym's comes out or when Ashton's was revealed? That's a huge change in the party's understanding of their motivations.

Honesty in this party has been a game from the start, and as the exercises show, it still mostly is. A panopticon is, unsurprisingly, not a great way to make people trust each other; a little open hiding and actions over words are in order. I don't think that's necessarily a problem, in that I think Bells Hells share, if not a vast overreaching goal, an agreement regarding their pretty significant task. But I think any deeper trust is yet to be actually tested, tried, and forged.